Good Relationship Beginnings
To quote a wise friend of mine “beginnings are great and endings suck.”
Beginnings can often portend endings. The problem is, we aren’t looking ahead in the beginning. But we should be.
Keeping your eyes and ears open from the start can prevent you from getting into bad situations that are difficult to get out of later.
To an extent, failure to look ahead is natural, especially if we are feeling some internal pressure to be in a relationship. But it is not only desperation that makes us not see the warning signs that are likely already there. It is also the blinders of the feeling that “hope springs eternal.”
Desire for a mate will make us feel excited to be alive, lose weight automatically, while at the same time blind us to the qualities in the other that don’t make for a good match.
Some questions to ask yourself:
Would I want this person for a friend if I wasn’t sexually attracted to them?
What bad habits do they have that could become intolerable over time?
They have 100 good qualities but is that one bad quality (for example, maybe they smell bad) a no go?
Am I thinking the love of a good (woman/man) will transform them?
Do I continue with this person or move on?
When you find someone you are drawn to, the fear of loss can be very anxiety producing. This fear that there may never be anyone else is universal. Feeling secure on your own and having good friends, both male and female, is key to making decisions from strength.
I can help you eliminate your self-diminishing thoughts such as I am a failure or something is wrong with me. You can learn to soothe yourself, believe in yourself and transform what feels like failure into a learning experience.
It can be lonely living alone but
it can feel lonelier trying to live with the wrong person
Call Roberta Gallagher today
Learn more about relationship beginnings
and how relationship coaching will help you