Frustrated with your partner?
Fighting about every little thing?
Feeling betrayed, or tempted to cheat?
Counseling will help you:
Understand the changes of midlife
Feel fully understood and valued
End the cheating, lying and infidelity
Have fewer arguments, improve communication
Stop fighting over money
Gain a return of your passion
Halt thoughts of divorce or separation
You might be asking yourself -- Where is the person I fell in love with? Why are we stuck in this negative cycle, arguing about the same issues?
Maybe you're wondering -- Why doesn’t my partner understand how I’m feeling? How come she / he is always angry with me? Why does he / she get so distant when we argue?
When you are unhappy in your marriage or relationship, everything else in your life seems more frustrating and difficult, too. It’s exhausting to keep trying to work things out when you feel like you keep beating your head against a wall.
And the more you try to fix it, the worse it gets. When you are so close to problems, it is impossible to see your part in them.
Being unhappy in your relationship can be costing you:
Inadequate attention to your work leading to financial problems
A sense of security and closeness with your mate.
Loss of confidence and self-esteem that permeates all aspects of your life.
In fact, the top 4 causes of marital discord according to John Gottman, the premier researcher in this field, are :
But it doesn’t have to be that way. Marriage counseling or couples coaching can really give you the necessary insights and tools to create a lasting difference.
You see, most of us are never taught how to live as a part of a couple. We bring the concepts of relationship that we saw in our parents. The desire to really express what we want or to speak up about what we don’t really like in ways that our partner can fully hear have not been taught.
So we argue, and judge, and blame, and feel bad about ourselves feeling lost for how to do differently.
There is a rich array of tools available that I have blogged about. You might find there blogs about relationships of interest. You might start with these:
Some of us withdraw from our marriage emotionally, and seek satisfaction elsewhere. If you have done this you know that this creates more problems. Torn between two “lovers” is a nasty place to be filled with guilt and dishonesty.
Maybe you already know that once you’ve checked out emotionally, it can be really hard to muster up the desire for fixing a problem.
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What the Experts Know About Why
Relationships Break Up
The most common reasons couples break up, according to the research are:
Contempt for their partner -- an arrogance that leads to disrespect, rolled eyes, looking down on the other
Feeling unappreciated, or over-controlled
Lack of sex, affection and intimate communication
So what can happen in couples counseling or relationship coaching is that you will learn:
1. To see problems in ways where solutions are possible.
2. Feel more empowered by using communication tools to express yourselves.
3. Start to see the issues from both points of view.
4. Decreases emotional avoidance
5. Modifies dysfunctional behavior.
If you are finding it hard to believe that this person you found so wonderful at the beginning of your relationship seems to not be listening to you anymore, it’s time for a change in behavior and communication.
Stop the emotional drift away from one another by facing your issues with the help of a professional. I have coached and counseled thousands of couples in not only learning new skills but in applying them to behavioral change.
You and your partner can learn how to :
Manage anger in constructive ways
How to fight fair
Create sexual and intimacy connections that work for you both
Rebuild trust after infidelity
Deal with matters of finances with mutual participation
Most importantly, to focus on building positive interactions and seeing one another in positive
And I know I can help you two either in my office in South Miami, or via Skype.
Maybe you have started thinking this isn’t the partnership you wanted. You’re both unhappy and know you need help to decide if this marriage is going to last. You believe you need help if you decide the marriage is going to dissolve, getting through the divorce process.
If you have children you know that you will forever be connected and will need help with the transition of a split up. The same skills required in a marriage will be necessary if the relationship become co-parenting.
It is most important that you choose someone to guide you that you feel comfortable with. This is the most significant variable in successful counseling.
I'd like to make you this offer:
If you think you need relationship coaching or couples counseling and are exploring who to work with, let's arrange a FREE 30 minute phone chat about my proven approach and how your life can improve by working with me on your relationship.
Roberta Gallagher, LCSW, LMFT
305 - 775 - 5101
Nothing gets better by waiting