When you were younger, chances are, you probably thought sex ended at a certain age. Remember thinking your parents didn’t have sex after you born? Nothing could be further than the truth. Sure, things are different than they were when you were in your 20s or 30s, but not only can couples can still have a very fulfilling sex life, sex after 50 can be even better than you imagine. If you are meeting some challenges in this area, as a relationship counselor, I can help. Flirtat

The movie version of E.L. James novel, “50 Shades of Grey” hits the theaters in time for Valentine’s Day. When the novel first came out a few years ago, it helped unlock a lot of women’s hidden fantasies and sparked a revival in their sex life. Silk ties and handcuffs became common place in the bedroom and couples started experimenting a little more. You don’t have to re-create the scenes in the book to spice things up, but there are ways to find what you like. One of the wor

Remember when you were a kid and every asked, what you were going to be for Halloween? It was exciting to pretend to be someone or something else for the magical special day. Some of us even as adults now still enjoy Halloween – there’s still magic in looking forward to being anything and anyone. Use Halloween to Alter your Persona and Give a Lift to your Sex Life Role playing can be awkward at first if you have never tried it. If you have been feeling a certain sameness to

Copyright 2013 Roberta Gallagher You are part of a couple / in a marriage and it feels sort of stale. You appreciate the stability, but long for the feelings that naturally were there at the beginning. Fear not, those excited, loving feelings can return. The difference is that you have to decide that you will take the initiative to create what your body’s naturally produced chemicals did without trying. Arousal happens in the mind To be sexy you need to be an individual with

Copyright 2013 Roberta Gallagher Intimacy both sexual and emotional is something couples and individuals crave. Yet, despite our desire for it, this is a delicate area for most people to voice. In counseling, really intimate thoughts and behaviors are one of the last things that many people will talk candidly about. So I tell my clients: It is difficult to create an environment for these most cherished ways of connecting if we cannot share what they mean to us. Funny story —

Copyright 2013 Roberta Gallagher Last week I wrote about the assumption of My Partner Never Changes, and how feeling invisible can cause couples to look elsewhere to feel seen, heard, and appreciated. This week’s assumption is just as deadly to happiness in marriage and committed relationships. Passion Fades Over Time This assumed belief sets you up to be out of touch with the man / woman within you. Your partner will begin to feel like a piece of furniture and devalued as an

“I am who I am!” It’s a statement I hear often in the context of couples counseling. I always wonder:are you saying you are not capable of change? Sometimes this kind of take it or leave it declaration is said in frustration, as a defense against feelinganxious, depressed, or pressured. It’s worth examining whether you are feeling guilty or disrepected when you hear yourself say such a statement. But another possibility is that this is a request for acceptance. Saying I am